We are in the process of making some decisions about bussing at our church and whether or not to continue carrying out that ministry. You may or may not have been part of that ministry or even known it to have existed. It's a hard decsion to make given how much of a struggle it is to keep it going and the fact that very few people seem to care to keep it going - myself included!!!
But let me provide a different perspective on it....this blog entry came from a fellow Children's Minister this morning. It is POWERFUL and helps shed some new thoughts on this debate. Perhaps it will strike you like it struck me........
I used to do a lot of Bus Ministry. Things have changed in the last few years where running busses is not feasible right now… but I still have a little place in my heart ready to pounce when the time is right again.
Bus Ministry is a great place to learn a lot… hard and fast. You make a lot of mistakes… and you ask a lot of internal questions… and it challenges the living crizzle out of your beliefs and makes you wonder if it’s worth it at all.
Once I remember questioning whether pulling a kid out of their situation for only a couple of hours a week was actually doing any good for them at all. I was explaining to God how they’re bombarded with family issues, inner-city pressures, peer-pressure like you’ve never seen… how was my little song-n-dance once a week going to provide any help… especially for those who didn’t half listen?
God told me—I must stop here for a moment and make sure you understand that when I say “God Told Me”, that it works like this: I get a really excellent idea in my mind that I know in a million years would never come from my own jacked up, over functioning brain—flatly”:
“When you’re in a fire… any moment you’re not burning is a great moment.”
I knew exactly what He was telling me. These kids were in the worst of situations… and though I was questioning our effectiveness, God was making it clear that every moment they were free from that situation was a precious, precious time for them. It helped me so much. Suddenly I saw their hyperactivity in a new light. They were excited to just be kids for once. They were getting a chance to play, a chance to connect with adults who truly cared about them as people. I wasn’t allowed to downplay any of the time we spent with them after that.
This concept doesn’t only apply to Bus Ministry… but to any ministry to children. Sure, we only get them a few hours a week… assuming they come every time the doors are open… but that time is precious. Especially from God’s point of view. Even if all we did was play with our kids rather than teach, for some of them it would be the most spiritually refreshing moments in their week. Experiencing God’s unconditional love in a safe, accepting environment should be the foundation of every children’s ministry experience.
My wife and I have mentioned to each other before about how we would like to talk with some folks from the fundamental Baptist movement. You know, the one in which ladies wear long skirts and the men/boys are typically in collard shirts tucked into pants??? I am fairly conservative myself and have often wanted to strike up a conversation (dare I say a friendship) with their families.
But here's the thing - they seem closed off??? Perhaps they get tired of people making fun of them or staring at them, but I am genuinly curious. So, are any of you fundamental baptists? Would you be willing to talk about your beliefs with me and my family?
This may not be the best place for it, but I don't have any other option to try and communicate these questions. Perhaps I am a little strange (no comments about that, ya hear?), but I thought I'd give it a shot!
I have posted before about the importance of Family Ministry and the necessity of parents discipling their kids in the home. Chances are you guys may even be sick of hearing me talk about it. But a lot of the reasons I am so passionate about family ministry are things that weigh heavily on my heart, and should be on ALL of our minds as Christians. Let me explain:
Reasons Why Family Ministry Should Be Important
It is Biblically mandated for the church and all Believers to teach the things of God to children (Psalm 78:1-8, Deuteronomy 6:1-9).
Jesus warned us not to hinder children from coming to him (Matthew 19:14).
The most effective way to make disciples is by raising them yourself! Having more children means more people for you to disciple (Matthew 28:19-20), which is the goal of the Christian life!
We are loosing Christians FASTER than we are replacing them! This includes stats from both new conversions and new births into Christian families. For more stats on this, listen to my previous post: Click Here!
If what happens in the home becomes the center of one's life, personality, goals, etc., then God NEEDS to be taught in the home. Otherwise God becomes someone one "does" once per week.
Kids will eventually grow up and become adults. If they are set to believe God is the center of their life, they are more likely to stay connected to Him when trials come and big decisions are made.
The end goal here is to produce Fully, Committed Disciples of Christ who go and make a difference in the world. We can all use reminders to keep that in mind while we make decisions for and about our kids: Homeschool, public school or Christian school; sports, music, community, or no activities; devotions at home or no devos at home, etc. KEEP THE END IN MIND!
This list is not exhaustive, but hopefully get people thinking. Do you have any "Reasons" to add?
Typically, when my family is out and about, we get lots of people looking at us - some even make comments about / to us. You see, with 5 kids we are one of the larger families in the area (Port Huron, MI). We hear things like:
I could never do that!
It's hard enough with the two that I have!
She must be a saint! (Interesting they never say 'He' must be saint??)
You know what causes that right?
Are you done yet?
And those are more nicer comments!!! Let me say out of the shoot - these things are offensive to large families! They may seem like innocent comments, and we may laugh them off along with you; but at the heart of these comments us an un-Biblical, erroneous and sinful thought: That children are a burden and not a blessing! (Understand that I do NOT have anyone in particular in mind right now, but am making general comments on a personal blog.)
It is clear that God calls children a blessings - so why would I want to hinder that blessing? I have heard all the arguments and most of them stem back to selfish desires and wants. I AM NOT SAYING THAT EVERYONE SHOULD HAVE A LARGE FAMILY!!! That is not the point! There are some families that have tried for years to have children but have been unable to. Honestly, that breaks my heart! I would love to see those couples be able to have as many children as they want, but that is NOT our call!
What I am saying is that we should allow God to influence the size of our family - whether that's 1 child or 18 blessings! We should prayerfully consider these decisions in light of God's Word and Wisdom. I can give you lots of reasons why we should limit our family size, but just about all of them are un-Biblical. I can give you an equal number of reasons why we should ALLOW God to have control of that area of our lives. At the very least, bring God into the equation! Talk with Him, ask Him, then wait for a response!
My wife has had 5 C-sections and we are not sure if her body can handle any more. But we are equally unsure if her body will handle 1 more, or 5 more. We are not going to be irrational about it - we trust and value the opinion of her OB-GYN (who is the best in the area according to just about everyone). We believe God will make it know when he wants us to be finished. We also believe God has given us wisdom and discernment to process through these decisions.
Dr. J. Robert McQuilken had been the President of Columbia Bible (International) College for nearly 22 years. But his wife, Muriel, came down with Alzheimer's and he found himself torn between to divine callings. He made the right choice!
If you would like, you can get more information about Dr. McQuilken's story HERE.
After talking with a dear friend (via email), I thought I would add a caveat to the previous post. This article is harsh! There is no question about it. For many of you it is offensive and judgemental. I DO NOT FULLY SUPPORT Dr. Baucham methods and do not necessarily fully support his conclusions, but I do think that homeschooling should be an option considered (via prayer, God's word, seeking the advice of wise believers and being given a genuine peace about the decision) when it comes to educating our children. And not just blown off as too radical to impossible without weighing out the pros and cons.
For some, this is simply not possible (single mothers, families in which both parents must work). For others, parents have chosen to have their families in the public schools to be a light for Christ. [Again, this is all under the assumption that parents are actively engaged in the learning process, which I think we all would agree should be the case.] So let me direct you to a more balanced article when it comes to the options for Christian parents to educate their children.
This blog entry does a nice job (it is rather long though) at laying out thoughts and questions to consider given where you are and if you are considering a change.
Also, since I put a link to a strong homeschooling article, I'll put on on a strong Public schooling option. This blog entry, in fact the entire blog, is written by a parent who purposefully sends their kids to public school. I have not read these blog entries fully yet, so will not comment on them now, but there are lots of voices out there talking about this.
NOTE OF CAUTION: If you click on this link, you will delve into another huge controversial issue among Christian families and the church - that of public school education and Christianity.
Dr. Voddie Baucham, who've I mentioned before, makes a strong case about "The Top 5 Reasons Not to Send Your Kids Back to Government Schools." Again, for most people we land on one side or the other of this issue. Meaning, you are either OK with public schools or you are not. Which is why people get so upset about this issue. But, that's not why I bring it up!
I bring it up to help people to start a dialogue about the issue! Since most Christian families send their kids to public schools (85-90% according to the link), the voice NOT being heard is the one choosing to home school or Christian school their kids. As a homeschooling dad myself with my 5 kids, my voice is typically played off as being "radical" (at best) or "asinine" (at worst, and yes that IS an actual word). I'm also curious what my fellow Children's Ministers think about this issue as well.
Have any thoughts?
Dean
PS - I've been gone for a couple of weeks moving into a new house and taking a few days off work. So I thought I would come out with a bang!
As I look at the lay of the land in Children’s Ministry, there are a lot of churches in America today debating whether or not to start some type of Family Ministry program. Well, if I may be as so bold as to put this question to rest: YES YOU SHOULD! Parents are struggling in the face of a culture that tells many of them they have made wrong decisions having kids, going to church, or choosing at all to teach about God. They need to know they are doing some things right.
Parents also need to know that the church will help give them ideas, resources, and a place to connect with other parents. It is my belief that this should all be part of a family ministry program that crosses the silos we typically see in ministry. But if that is not an option, start somewhere. I personally recommend doing some Take-It-Home Events or Key Age events. Check out the Faith at Home books by Mark Holman.
Even more churches have started Family Worship events bringing kids and parents together in a kid friendly worship environment. That is also a good place to start, but should not stop there. Why? I think, and this may hurt a little bit, that it continues to perpetuate the idea that the families need to come to church to connect to God. What happens at home is far more important for faith building then what takes place in the church. The church cannot, and should never have, taken the primary responsibility for the discipleship of children. For more thoughts on this issue, read Family Driven Faith by Dr. Voddie Baucham.
If we want to have kids that do not leave the church after high school, let’s focus our efforts on having kids follow the Great Commandment: to Love God with everything they are!
We’ve been on a journey looking at how to connect the dots from Sunday to Sunday to bring about spiritual formation and the discipleship of children. We have discussed the issue IF we should try and connect with kids throughout the week and listed some ideas on how to make that happen.
Let’s be honest, Children’s Directors are NEVER short of work to be done! What we need to then focus on is how we maximize our resources and efforts to bring accomplish discipleship of children. What is the most and/or least effective?
One of the strongest messages of God’s Word is that parents are responsible for the spiritual formation of children. But if we believe that, why do we continue to set-up programs that do not include them? We should be focusing on events that bring kids and parents together. The weekend Christian Education programming will always be there, but what about special events and family ministry ideas?
I think we should also be striving to do everything we can to encourage and equip parents with the tools necessary to help them raise Godly disciples in their children. Parents are berated all day long (often from themselves) how they don’t measure up; we should take every chance we get to encourage and empower them with this clear message:
God chose THEM to raise their children! There is no one else He would rather do it. There is no one else that can do it and He will give them the ability to make it happen.
Those are key areas we should focus on as we seek to partner with parents to keep kids connected to the Vine.
